“CAN YOU FIND ME SOFT ASYLUM?”

 

A DEFINITIVE REFERENCE GUIDE TO JIM MORRISON’S FINAL DAYS

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By Jerome L. Wallerstein

Copyright 2004, Jerome L. Wallerstein Livermore, California

 

 

 

 

First printing, 2004

 

 

 

 

This book is a compendium of previously published and available quotes, for which the author takes no credit. The work is intended to serve as a reference guide for fans and researchers. Accompanying each quote the author has provided the original source; for those seeking further information it is recommended you explore the sources being referenced.

 

 

Questions and correspondence may be submitted to:

Evening Star Publications, 9 Parklane Dr., Ordinda, CA. 94563

or by email to: Wallerstein@sbcglobal.net

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Last words, last words...out.”

Jim Morrison


 

AUTHOR’S PROLOGUE

 

 

Jim Morrison and The Doors - a plethora of books exist on virtually every facet of their existence and legacy, so why write another, and how does this one differ from the rest?

 

The purpose of this book is simple: to gather together in a single compendium the sequence of events and oft-conflicting accounts of the final days of Jim Morrison, using quotes and verifiable information. There is seemingly no end to the quotes one could call upon, and determining what to leave out proved to be one of the biggest challenges – ultimately, in the interest of readability and in an effort to avoid redundancy, I elected to include those which most clearly served the purpose of the book. The goal is for the novel to be viewed as a definitive reference source for fans and researchers alike. Frequently asked questions surrounding Morrison’s final days form the basis of the book and lend a fundamental structure to the work.

 

The murky circumstances surrounding Morrison’s death have drawn interest from all corners of the earth. Given there exists so much conflicting and contradictory information in circulation, it is no wonder that confusion and rumor exist to this day – and equally clear why his death has taken on near mythological proportions in the more than thirty years since it occurred. Intriguing discrepancies, combined with blatant traces of subterfuge and deception, stoke the flames of interest and, in a morbid twist of irony, keep the subject matter “alive”. Although conflicted at first, I consciously chose to include quotes from sources universally held to be completely credible, as well as quotes from individuals generally regarded as dubious (including Linda Ashcroft, whose self-serving book – which purports to be a first hand account of a long-term love affair with Jim Morrison – has drawn the passionate ire of devoted Doors fans from around the globe). The reason for including quotes from such disparate sources is to give evidence to how even today we continue to actively fuel myth-making by way of clouding the truth.

 

This book does not purport to provide any “new” information; on the contrary, it is precisely the “pre-existing” documentation that forms the very foundation to this work. The uninitiated will be well served by reading any of the dozens of biographies available in libraries, on the Internet and from bookstores. I have tackled this particular subject matter because it interests me personally; my hope is that it will prove insightful to fans and historians, and a valuable reference tool for authors and researchers.


QUESTIONS, QUOTES & CONFLICTS

 

 

Q. WHAT WAS MORRISON’S HEALTH AND STATE OF MIND JUST PRIOR TO HIS TRIP TO PARIS?

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: When Jim would pick up an occasional venereal disease. Max Fink sent him to an old friend of his, a gynecologist in the Wilshire district who would treat Jim quietly, after regular office hours. Most of the Doors and their wives used the services of Dr. Arnold Derwin who would later be cited as an authority on why Jim’s death could not have been caused by respiratory distress, based on the fact that Derwin himself had not been aware of Jim’s existing asthma condition, nor had Jim seemed ill the last time Dr. Derwin had seen him. PG. 175 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

DR. ARNOLD DERWIN: Jim was in excellent health before he went to Paris...The fall from the Chateau Marmont did not do any serious damage. His lung was not punctured, only bruised and there was nothing from that injury that would create a blood clot, result in a respiratory condition, or cause him to spit up blood”. PG. 457 BREAK ON THROUGH

PATRICIA BUTLER: But Derwin had no access to Jim’s past medical records, nor was Jim likely to provide an accurate history, assuming one had been requested. At the time Jim left for France, Derwin had not seen the singer for a year or more, making it unlikely the doctor would be able to speak with authority on Jim’s physical condition at that time. PG. 175 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

MONDO 2000... Hey! No one wants to be expunged from the Book of Life. How many medical workers at UCLA knew that Jim Morrison was being treated for gonorrhea in the Fall of 1970? Knew of the biopsy that confirmed adenoma of the penile urethra -- often consequence to repeated gonorrhea? This is a particularly swift form of cancer whose only alternative may have been radical castration...“Queen Mu, PP. 131 MONDO 2000 MAGAZINE

PATRICIA BUTLER: Paul Rothchild had also tried to get Jim to seek professional help on more than one occasion. “Oh! Everybody tried!” Rothchild recalled. “I tried a lot, especially when he brought up repeatedly his problems getting hard”, said Rothchild, referring to Jim’s increasing bouts with impotency, a problem not uncommon in alcoholics, which both Pam and Jim had spoken about with Paul. PG. 146 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE.

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: His steady weight gain was compounded by the ever present layer of bloat caused by his chronic alcoholism. The stress of the [Miami] trial, together with a viral infection he’d picked up a short time before, had triggered Jim’s childhood asthma, leaving him with a deep cough that he was making worse by chain smoking. PG. 157 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

Q. What led Jim Morrison to leave for Paris in 1971, never to return? Given the popular and critical acclaim garnered by L.A. Woman, and now that the band seemed to be working together better than they had in years, one would think that Morrison would want to ride out the wave of positive developments.

 

HANK ZEVALLOS: Hey, I knew Jim Morrison since before “Light My Fire” and was with him his last night in Los Angeles. His whole last year he had been more into his writing, film making and doing an album on the lines of “Horse Latitudes.” When he left for Paris he was to pursue those artistic directions, not so much as run away from anything. FEBRUARY 2000 http://www.findadeath.com/Decesed/m/Jim%20Morrison/jim_morrison.htm

 

BILL SIDDONS: He went off to Paris to concentrate on his writings. He was working on two different screenplays as far as I know, and he was working on his poetry. But he went off to stop pursuing the rock and roll dream because he’d achieved it and he didn’t like it. And he said ‘What am I but a writer?’ PG. 448 BREAK ON THROUGH

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: “I still don’t understand why you’re going” is what I say instead. “It’s hard to explain” he says after a long silence. I kind of feel responsible for [Pamela]. She’s not like you, she can’t do anything on her own, can’t take care of herself – it’s over, but I think I owe her this.” PG. 296 STRANGE DAYS

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: I was thinking I might use the time in Paris to write some one-act plays. At this point, movies are so far beyond me financially, I want to work on something I can do in the street if I have to. I want to be the writer I am. There is my poetry. I have that novel kicking around in my head. I still hear music. There is no end to the work.” PG. 478 WILD CHILD

 

BILL SIDDONS: "He said, I don't know who I am, and I don't know what I'm doing at the moment. I even don't know what I really want, I just wanna go away. Pamela was behind it all. It was her who pushed him to leave, and who told him to take his scrap books and write a theatre play." FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

The sessions for L.A. Woman were positive and the band felt better about matters than they had in ages. Although he and Pamela had planned the trip for some time (she had traveled in advance of Jim so as to secure living arrangements) it is indicative of the lack of communication between Morrison and the others that the news came as a bit of a surprise to his band mates; they clearly had been kept in the dark about his specific intentions.

 

RAY MANZAREK: And then he dropped the napalm. “I’m going to Paris” he said. ...We’re close to being finished here” he continued. Most of the mixes are done. Everything sounds great. Why don’t you guys go ahead and finish it up? I’m leaving for Paris in two days. Pam’s already there, she’s got a little apartment...got it all set up. I’m going to join her over there.” PG. 8 LIGHT MY FIRE

 

Although Ray states that it came as a bit of a surprise, Robby Krieger states that they had reason to anticipate it:

 

ROBBY KRIEGER: He has talked about Paris for quite a while now. After we had recorded L.A. Woman and thereby fulfilled the terms in our contract nothing could hold him anymore. He took off, without having said any proper good-byes. He just said that he would fly to Paris tomorrow and that he would stay there for some time." FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

Others, too, were aware that Morrison intended to join Pamela Courson in Paris:

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: Though he didn’t set a departure date for Paris – he wanted to wake up one day and get on a plane, not dread it – we knew it would be soon. Any day. Pg. 477 WILD CHILD

 

DANNY SUGERMAN: [Morrison said] That’s exactly what I’m doing – a semi-sabbatical, a career break. I’ll be back in no time. Pg. 178 WONDERLAND AVENUE

 

Q. How did his friends and bandmates react to the news that Jim Morrison was going to Paris?

 

Manzarek sensed that “something was wrong”, as Morrison had always been involved in the final mixes of the albums but tried his best to be supportive and not over-react.

RAY MANZAREK: “Paris, huh?” I said. “Now, that’s interesting, man. That would be a good place to get away for a while. “ “Yeah, I think so, too” he said. PG. 9 LIGHT MY FIRE

RAY MANZAREK: To be honest, I hoped Jim would use the break to get away from his drinking buddies; get away from the hangers-on who were always attaching themselves to him and taking him to the too many bars, dives, gin mills, and wherevers. The sycophants. The leeches, as John and Robby and I called them. His “friends,” as they became called in later years...they were just sucking up his energy, keeping him from being a poet...and he wouldn’t be writing. He wouldn’t be creating. He should have been spinning out great passages of new verse, instead of talking it out and staggering home to Pam way past the midnight hour. How many great lyrics got lost in that senseless flood of drunken activity? How many great poems fell victim to those bad habits...

 

...They [Jim’s drinking buddies] were a real sore point with Pam Courson, Jim’s live-in lady and soul mate. Pam was always angry because Jim was running around and getting drunk with his friends...So to make things up to her, on her suggestion, he was going to take her to Paris.

 

Hell, it seemed like a good idea; at least at the time...He could be the next generation of the bohemian ideal, an American in Paris...I wanted him to go to Paris and write again. Forget about being a rock star. It was time for Jim Morrison to be an artist again. Just like in the beginning. PGS. 10 – 122 LIGHT MY FIRE

 

FRANK LISCIANDRO: "I remember Babe brought him to the airport but Kathy and I met him there. They went in their car and we went in another car, and we met at L.A. International Airport the night that Jim was supposed to be leaving for Paris. We sat in a bar, at a table, talking about a lot of different things - what he planned to do there, that we all planned to visit him there, how long he planned to be there, like that. But what strikes me about that evening - it was a typical evening with Jim. We had become so animated with conversation, and so involved in our conversation that we missed the three announcements for the airplane, and in fact Jim missed his plane, he never got on the plane that night and he had to go back to the airport the following morning and get on the plane, so that's when he left for Paris." The Doors Quarterly interview.

RAY MANZAREK: So off he went. Left the session, just like that. John and Robby and I just looked at each other, dumbfounded. All we could do was shrug our shoulders. “I think it’s a good idea” said Robby. “Me too” I agreed. “Paris and writers, it’s a natural.” “Maybe he’ll get the muse back” Robby said hopefully. PG. 12 LIGHT MY FIRE

 

Q. How long did Morrison intend to stay in Paris? Did he have any concrete long-term plans, or even a general sense of what he was going to do long-term? did Morrison give any indication that he intended to resume his activities with The Doors?

 

RAY MANZAREK: “How long, uhh...how long you gonna be there?” “You know, Ray, I don’t know” Jim said...”I don’t have any plans yet” he said. “I just need a break. Some time to myself. A couple of months, six months. Maybe a year. Who knows, man? I don’t.

“It’ll give you a chance to work on those notes from Miami” I encouraged. “I want to read that book.” It was to be called Observations on America, While on Trial for Obscenity. He smiled. “I’m gonna rake ‘em over the coals. This time it’s my turn.” “A new de Tocqueville,” I said. “We need one for the twentieth century. “ He just smiled that sheepish little-boy grin of his and waved his hand at me. “Oh, man.” “Hey, you can do it. Who better?” PG. 9 LIGHT MY FIRE

LINDA ASHCROFT: [Upon Morrison presenting Ashcroft with a diamond ring, Ashcroft replied ]Give this to me in September. When you get back from Paris”. PG. 475 WILD CHILD

PATRICIA KENNEALY: [In his letters he writes about]...how much he looks forward to our being together in New York as he has promised, by October at the latest, so he can catch the fall colors. PG. 315 STRANGE DAYS

LINDA ASHCROFT: ...He’d give [Pamela] six months to help her get off heroin, a settlement to give her a start, and she would sign an agreement not to sue. I had a hundred misgivings, but he said “I need to do this to be the man I want to be.”...Finally, he repeated himself about the six months promised Pam to get her on her feet. “I owe her that” he said. PG. 476 WILD CHILD

 

DANNY SUGERMAN: "The album is out, as you probably know. Sorry this letter is late, but things have been really hectic these last few weeks, Jim is, in fact, in Europe writing a book on the trail. No tour, or concert is/are planned for quite some time yet, seeing how Jim probably won't be back for quite some time. The Doors are NOT breaking, just taking a vacation. Rest and recuperation.

Sincerely yours,
Danny Sugerman, Doors Productions." On
27th April 1971, LETTER TO FAN

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: ...And then he gets into us, him and me, how we will be together in New York, in the fall, for the start of “the season” as he puts it, how we will get a loft downtown, have poetry readings of his stuff at the St. Mark’s Church poetry project where Tandy Martin’s husband reads his own work, I can write my novels and Jim will do poems and films, maybe we will even write things together... PG. 296 STRANGE DAYS

ALAN RONAY: [Jim Morrison said] I’ve no intention of leaving Paris. FROM ALAN RONAY’S ARTICLE “FROM ALAN RONAY’S ARTICLE “JIM AND I - FRIENDS UNTIL DEATH”

 

ROBBY KRIEGER: We never really broke up…It was understood that it was gonna be a long vacation for everybody. But there was no talk of breaking up The Doors…We finished our contract with Elektra, as far as albums go…we were gonna take a long vacation for sure, but we didn’t say okay, let’s break up the group…you do a solo album, you do a solo album, and whatever….” PG. 447 break on through

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: When Jim left LA in March 1971, he left The Doors as well – whether they knew it or not, whether they believed it or not. www.geocities.com/unfaithfulservant2002/KENNEALY.html

 

JOHN DENSMORE: "... I am sure that he wanted to come back." FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: Jim was leaving for Paris. We were running out of time together. He pulled me over to him and asked ‘Is it too much to ask that you wait six months for me?...drawing his finger along my body, he repeated “Wait for me. Wait for me”. PG. 481 WILD CHILD

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: I won’t be back in the States until September at the earliest, he told [Tere Tereba]. PG. 163 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

JIM MORRISON: "I think we'll do a couple of albums and then everyone will probably get into their own thing: each guy in the band has certain projects that they want to do more independently." Rolling Stone interview with Ben Fong-Torres a few days before his departure

 

According to Densmore, when he and Jim Morrison spoke on the phone in late June Morrison himself suggested they record another album upon his return from Paris.

 

JOHN DENSMORE: “How’s L.A. Woman doing?”…”Great! It’s really doing great,” I said enthusiastically…”Well, maybe we should do another one?” “Sure Jim, good idea.” “When do you think you might come back?” I asked him...”Oh, a few months.”… PG. 7 RIDERS ON THE STORM

RAY MANZAREK: The next day John reported in. Everything was okay. Jim was feeling good, having a good time. He had shaved his beard, he was excited about the critical acclaim for [L.A. Woman] and, best of all, he was looking forward to playing again. “As soon as I get back we gotta go on the road,” he told John. “I want to play those songs live. We never got a real chance to do that.”...”Well, shiiiit, John, let’s just book a little tour. What d’ya say?” “When?” “When I get back.” “When’s that?” “I don’t know...I’m having a pretty good time,” Jim answered. “I’ll be here a while yet.” “Well, okay,” said John. I’ll tell the guys.” “Good, give ‘em my love” answered Jim. PG. 13 LIGHT MY FIRE

RAINER MODDEMANN: When Tere took her leave, saying that she was looking forward to getting back to Los Angeles, Jim said that he would definitely not be back before September. FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

JERRY HOPKINS/DANNY SUGERMAN: When John told Jim how well the album and single were selling and how much the press liked the records, Jim was amazed. “If they like this, wait’ll they hear what I got in mind for the next one,” he told John. PG. 361 NO ONE HERE GETS OUT ALIVE

ROBBY KRIEGER: In fact Jim had never quit The Doors, what else could he do, he would have been dead-bored after a couple of months. I think he always would have come back to the group. INTERVIEW WITH RAINER MODDEMANN, 1999 DOORS QUARTERLY MAGAZINE

 

HANK ZEVALLOS: There also were no future Doors plans in the works. They had completed their contract extension with Elektra and there was only a very loose “we’ll meet in maybe a year and see what happens.” FEB 2000 –www.findadeath.com

 

RAY MANZAREK: "That Jim went to Paris didn't mean the split of the band. To the contrary - as soon as he had left we started practicing new songs in our rehearsal room, songs that Robby had written for the next Doors album with Jim." FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

FRANK LISCIANDRO: Jim's feeling at the time - and I remember this distinctly because we had more than one conversation about it - was that his days in Los Angeles were over for this particular part of his life. He had finished the commitment to Elektra Records and had finished the last album they owed them on the contract. And he had somewhat put behind him the Miami trial although there might be an appeal or whatever that was behind him. Pamela was waiting for him in Paris and had established a home there. My feeling and the feeling of the people who knew him closely was that he was leaving. As a matter of fact we had closed the HWY Production office, and with this it was over for Jim in Los Angeles. He was leaving for good. For as long as he could get away from L.A. He was through with this particular part of his career and his life." FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

HERVE’ MULLER: I remember that he honestly wanted to settle in France. PG. 163 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: [Morrison] grew somewhat evasive when talk would inevitably turn to The Doors... PG. 162 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

BILL SIDDONS: “We talked to him about coming back” says Siddons, “and all we ever got was ‘Ah. No plans! I’m having a great time. Maybe someday we’ll do another record, but no plans!” … PG. 162 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

Q. WHAT, IF ANY, COMMUNICATION DID MORRISON HAVE WITH HIS BANDMATES WHILE HE WAS IN PARIS?

JERRY HOPKINS/DANNY SUGARMAN: [Morrison] placed an early morning call to John Densmore and asked him how the material was coming. PG. 361 NO ONE HERE GETS OUT ALIVE

RAY MANZAREK: John [Densmore] finally said, impatiently, “I’m gonna call [Jim].” I said “Why? Let him alone for a while. He doesn’t want anybody bugging him. He’ll call when he’s ready.” John paced the rehearsal room, unable to control his anxiety. “I just gotta know” he said. “I can’t wait any longer.” And so he called him. PG. 13 LIGHT MY FIRE

Contrary to Manzarek’s statement that John Densmore initiated the call, Densmore claims that Morrison called him.

JOHN DENSMORE: The phone rang on a Thursday morning. “Hey, man, how ya doin’?” said the voice I knew only too well, the whiskeyed voice that struck terror in me. PG. 6 RIDERS ON THE STORM

 

And in contrast to what Densmore states, Rainer Moddemann claims Morrison calls on a different day:

 

MODDEMANN - On (Monday) 14th June he telephoned John Densmore in Los Angeles to find out how the sales of the new Doors album, L.A. Woman, were going. FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

Q. Morrison’s relationship with Pamela Courson was stormy and tempestuous from the start. How did they get along in Paris? Some have it that Morrison intended to dissolve their relationship once and for all, and others claim that they further depend their bond for one another in Paris.

 

ALAN RONAY: “…[Pamela] led her own independent life in Paris and did not live with him. FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

JERRY HOPKINS/DANNY SUGERMAN: To ZoZo (Elizabeth Lariviere) it seemed a peculiar relationship. Whenever she talked with Pamela, Pamela spoke only of Jim and how wonderful he was, “everything was Jeem, Jeem, Jeem.” But then when Pamela stayed out all night with some of the French friends she’d made through the rich count, in the mornings on the telephone she begged ZoZo to tell a lie for her. “Oh please say to Jeem I was in your friend’s house all the night and I’m going to come back at twelve.” I always used to have to say that to [Jim]. PG. 351 no one here gets out alive

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: “Pamela is having this fantasy about our getting back together. She seems to have confused the public image we’ve had for some time with the reality of the trip. If she introduces herself as Mrs. Morrison one more time, she’s going to have to slap me out of hysterics.”. ..Delighted by the sound of his voice, I had to make myself pay attention to what he was saying...September seems awfully far away.” PG. 483 WILD CHILD

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: [Morrison said] it’s over, but I think I owe her this...” ”This isn’t doing her any favors –“ “I know, I know, I just want to end it off gently”. PG. 296 STRANGE DAYS

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: For the first time he began talking about having children [with Pamela]... As they had done several times before in the States, the couple obtained another marriage license. PG. 158 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

BILL SIDDONS: [Referring to a marriage license allegedly taken out while in Paris] I know because I saw it.” PG. 473 BREAK ON THROUGH

 

JERRY HOPKINS/DANNY SUGERMAN: [For a period of time, while they traveled through the South of France] Jim and Pamela were getting along well, nearly as well as she’d one day boast. Living together for an extended period in a car and in small hotel rooms provoked small arguments, but the distractions were numerous and marvelous. PG 355 NO ONE HERE GETS OUT ALIVE

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: The thirtieth of June Jim’s voice was so tired, I wanted to send him my exuberance over the wire... “Pamela and I had our last fight. She made confetti of all my recent work. She’s never destroyed my writing before. I told her that ends my obligation to her.” PG 486 – 487 WILD CHILD

 

JIM MORRISON: Hello Bob, how are you? The weather today finally turned sunny, after a month of gray. Paris is beautiful in the sun, an exciting town, built for human beings. Speaking to Bill (Siddons) a while back I told him of our desire to stay here indefinitely. Will that be possible? Could you write and give me an idea of how long we can stay on living at our present rate, a sort of financial statement in general? Also, a copy of the partnership agreement, if it was ever completed. We have decided to turn the shop (Themis, Pamela's boutique) over to Tom and Judy (Pamela's sister and her husband), so they can seek alone. All but the furnishing sans some personal things, which we ought to keep. Eventually, we'd like to be completely clear of any involvement. Could you help to figure out the best way to do this? Incidentally, would you ask Judy for her parents' address and send them 100 bucks for the dog (Jim and Pamela's dog Sage)? Any luck on the credit cards? We Could use them made out in both our names. What's the problem? And if you'd send our cheque when you receive this - house bills are catching up. Please send $3,000. Give our best to all, later, Jim . letter to Bob Greene, received ON July 3, 1971

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: [In his letters to me] ...He speaks tenderly of how he misses me, of how it is winding down at last to the final break with Pam, of how there is so much history there, both good and bad, but that this is really it, as far as he’s concerned...” PG. 315 STRANGE DAYS

 

PATRICIA BUTLER: Jim told Bill [Siddons] that he was doing fine, that he and Pamela were living together and doing well… Jim and Pam talked briefly about buying a house in the French countryside. PG. 162-163 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

HERVE’ MULLER: [Pamela] wanted to find an old church or chapel and turn it into a house. PG. 163 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

KATHY LISCIANDRO:...maybe he did marry Pam but I know from a phone conversation with him in may that he kept up his old on-again-off-again style of living, one apartment with her, one without. PG. 113 THE DOORS COMPANION (ROCCO)

 

Q. WHERE EXACTLY DID MORRISON STAY WHILE IN PARIS?

 

George VRAINER MODDEMANN: At Jim's suggestion Pamela had flown to Paris on 14th February 1971, St Valentine's Day, to find an apartment for them and to prepare everything for his arrival. While looking, Pamela stayed at the Hôtel Georges V, which Jim had recommended to her....To begin with, they lived at the Hotel Georges V in Avenue Georges V. Only a week later Jim and Pamela moved in at No. 17 Rue Beautreillis. ZoZo gave them one of the three bedrooms of the spacious apartment, and Jim moved a desk for himself near to the window. He shaved off the long dark beard he had worn for almost six months... FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

PATRICIA BUTLER: When Jim first arrived in Paris in March, he stayed only one night with Pamela at the elegant Hotel Georges V before declaring it a little overdone for his maturing tastes. “It’s like a New Orleans bordello” he complained. So the couple had spent a few weeks at the more modest Hotel Du Nice, where Jim had again experienced problems with – and rejected medical treatment for – his asthma, before moving into the spacious but sparsely furnished apartment just off the rue St. Antoine that Pamela had arranged for them to sublet. Jim seemed pleased with Pamela’s choice. “Can’t get anything like this in L.A.,” he said. PG 159 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

PAMELA COURSON: Before living at rue Beautreillis, my boyfriend and I lived for three weeks at the Hôtel de Nice, rue de Beaux Arts, I think...” FROM PAMELA COURSON’S POLICE STATEMENT

RAINER MODDEMANN: In the sunny, quiet apartment in the Marais quarter he was very happy. He loved to walk down the Rue St. Antoine, an ordinary tourist, or take expeditions across the Ile St. Louis. He found total peace and quiet in the close-by Place des Vosges, an elegant and inspiring square slightly reminiscent of Venice, Italy, and incidentally the square where Victor Hugo had once lived. FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

Q. DID MORRISON FIND HIS MUSE IN PARIS? WAS HE TRULY PRODUCTIVE AS A WRITER?

 

LINDA ASHCROFT : Jim sent a postcard from Los Angeles, before he even took off for Paris...Ten days later, I received a note from Paris. A few hurried lines questioning what in the world he was doing...there were two more letters that, to my disappointment, included no poems. One page each saying he was lonely and tired and not finding the time to write...[subsequently speaking on the phone to Morrison, who had called from Paris] The writing isn’t going well? I asked. He’d hinted at writer’s block in his brief letters. “Not going at all. I thought talking to you might help. This is a bigger strain than I’d expected,” Jim admitted. Pg. 483 WILD CHILD

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: …In April, I get my first communiqué’ from Paris…May brings a real letter, June two more letters and a small package – the last things I am ever to receive from Jim’s hand. The gifts are as they are; but the letters are alarming. Not so much the first two, save only between the lines: Outwardly Jim speaks with real feeling of the beauty of Paris but then admits that he has been ill and unable to write as much as he would like, that he cannot seem to settle into a productive creative groove, cannot find his writing voice, and this makes him unhappy and uncertain. PG. 314 STRANGE DAYS

LINDA ASHCROFT: Jim gathered his strength by telling me he had made a tape in a studio of his three new songs to send to the other Doors as a peace offering...I wrote down the lyrics on the newspaper that was spread out on the table. In case Pamela got her hands on them, I told myself, I’ll have copies to present him at the airport. The songs were so beautiful, they made me cry. PG 498 WILD CHILD

 

ALAN RONAY: ...He wrote all the time. FROM ALAN RONAY’S ARTICLE “JIM AND I - FRIENDS UNTIL DEATH”.

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: “What makes dealing with Pamela worse is that I can’t write worth shit. I keep telling people about this novel I’m working on. Don’t remember what the hell I’ve told them, but it sure isn’t on paper...I sit with paper in front of me but I can’t write a goddamn sentence. Did I ever write anything? I can’t remember what I sounded like. PG 483 – 484 WILD CHILD

 

ALAN RONAY: He wrote practically every day.” PG. 158 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: He read from a long poem he had teased about in his postcard. A man in Paris reflects on America. The expatriate has a love / hate relationship with his own heartbeat of a country...The new poem was angry. PG. 486 WILD CHILD

 

KATHY LISCIANDRO: Maybe he was doing something close to a reasonable amount of writing. Maybe. The Jim I knew had a king-size block as a writer. For him to get off even a few lines a week might look like a burst of productivity from up close. PG. 113 THE DOORS COMPANION (ROCCO)

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: Jim’s next letter implied the writing was rolling; the next, a false start. Then he wrote a postcard claiming at least he was writing a poem about the blues...On the very day I received the postcard, Jim made a second call. ..[After meeting with an analyst who reassured him that he need not lose his creative edge by operating within a normal sphere, he realized] He had gone to help Pamela and found help for himself. PG. 485 WILD CHILD

 

Q. What was Jim Morrison’s general state of mind while in Paris?

 

JERRY HOPKINS/DANNY SUGERMAN: ...It was calm, at first. PG. 350 NO ONE HERE GETS OUT ALIVE

 

ALAN RONAY: In the beginning he was very hopeful and bright about a new life. Most of the time he was very calm and wasn’t drinking very much. He wrote practically every day…I rally felt that he totally reclaimed himself. BREAK ON THROUGH PG. 445

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: [In his first two letters to me]...he ends both missives on determinedly upbeat notes, as if he were trying to convince himself as well as me. Still, the subtext of depression is there in both letters, and much plainer in the second than in the first. PR. 315 STRANGE DAYS

 

RAINER MODDEMANN: Although it would seem that Morrison enjoyed traveling and certainly relished not having to put on airs or be hounded by paparazzi he nonetheless seemed to edge more and more into a state of depression. Morrison continued to struggle with his alcoholism and was probably wracked with guilt indecision and relative to his personal relationships (should he break it off once and for all with Pamela, should he return and live with Patricia Kennealy? What of the unborn child Kennealy had aborted? What was to become of the band? What did he want to do with his life? FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

KATHY LISCIANDRO: I suppose he’d have been pleased to find himself but my impression was he didn’t know where to look and had long ago given up trying, except maybe in the bottle. You know what people find in vodka bottles, vodka. PG. 113 THE DOORS COMPANION (ROCCO)

 

LINDA ASHCROFT: Jim sent a postcard from Los Angeles before he even took off for Paris...Ten days later I received a note from Paris. A few hurried lines questioning what in the world he was doing...There were two more letters that, to my disappointment, included no poems. One page each saying he was lonely and tired and not finding the time he had counted on to write.” PGS. 482 – 483 BREAK ON THROUGH

 

BILL SIDDONS: I spoke to Jim on three separate occasions. He always seemed to be in good spirits, happy that he’d gone [to Paris], and optimistic.” PG. 162 ANGELS DANCE AND ANGELS DIE

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: I had eight or ten cards and letters from him in the three months he spent there. Some were exalted and joyous and others were veiled in despair. The last letter he wrote me was mailed only a few days before he died. He wrote of how tired he was and how much he missed me. "My side is cold without you..." he told me. The letter was to weep for, and I did, and still do. INTERVIEW WITH AMERICAN LEGENDS

 

Frank Lisciandro’s recollections seem to corroborate this:

 

FRANK LISCIANDRO: “I had written to Jim about a month after he left saying that Kathy and I were planning a trip to Paris. In fact we were going to make a long motor drive through Eastern Europe and we would be stopping in Paris to pick up a car. In my letter I invited Pamela and Jim to come along with us on a particular part of the drive. We were going to see a friend of us in Hungary and we were going to be going to Greece and Turkey. I got a letter back from Jim saying that he had recently before been in Corsica, where he had in a typical Jim Morrison fashion lost his wallet, but then he was back in Paris, and he invited Kathy and me to stay with them at their apartment in Paris while we were there. He didn't mention about the trip whether or not he intended or wanted to think about going on a part of our trip. He also said that he was doing well and that it would be good to see old friends again.".” FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN PARIS” ARTICLE

 

…as do Alan Ronay’s, who paints a picture of Morrison’s time in Paris as one of peacefulness and serenity.

 

ALAN RONAY: Therefore, with a few exceptions, Jim and I spent almost the whole month of June alone together. Our days were tranquil and were probably the best we shared....In that brief period he was happy, calm and free. Paris was good for him. FROM ALAN RONAY’S ARTICLE “JIM AND I - FRIENDS UNTIL DEATH”

 

PATRICIA KENNEALY: …But it is the third letter Jim sends me, the last one, the June one, which genuinely frightens me…he calls to mind joyful things…but otherwise there is little joy here. He speaks of standing on the down slope to a void and not knowing where, or even if, he is; of crying himself to sleep on a night of rain and wondering if I heard him; says that for the first time he is uncertain of where I am, says that he reaches out for me in his sleep but his side is cold with my absence.

 

He writes that he thinks he really wants to be dead, not mad, after all, and how I always thought it was the other way around…he says that he feels cornered, says that he’s not even going to mail this to me after all.

 

And toward the end he writes that he is tired…says that he walked for miles and came home limping; says he doesn’t really know why he does these things and yet seems to learn so little... [He] says that now he requires that reassurance {that he hadn’t sold out – ed.} from me; says he wants me to look at him and tell him that he has not sold anything that could not be bought save by honest coinage.

 

There is much more in the same dreadful despairing vein: The pages seem frosted with hopelessness…The more I read and reread, the more I weep for him, and the more I want to jump on the first plane to Paris and drag him back with me to safety in my arms, forever, away from his pain.

 

But his pain seems to be his fellow-traveler, and other people are hearing very different things from him, seemingly, at this very moment… To some he talks of getting back in the studio in September; to others he speaks of having finally, definitively, broken with Pam...and wanting to return home before the fourth of July (bitter irony); to others still he extends invitations to come stay with him and Pam in their Parisian idyll. It is all probably true and meant, and to weep for. PGS. 315-316 STRANGE DAYS

 

RAINER MODDEMANN: The contradictory nature of Jim Morrison as a person becomes apparent. On the one hand he is plagued with self doubts, depressed with his immediate surroundings and his poor physical condition, even mentioning the wish to die, while on the other he's playing the carefree poet, with lots of plans on his mind, seemingly very glad to be in Paris. It can be supposed that he had only trusted Patricia, his intimate friend in far away New York, with the full truth of his condition. In his letter he declared that he would never lie to her, because she possessed his full trust. He also told her he would move to New York to live with her in October 1971, after finishing it off gently with Pamela. Had he become an actor in Paris, with Pamela and Tere as spectators? FROM RAINER MODDEMANN’S “QUIET DAYS IN <